If you are a long-time member of the Cellulite Elite, you may prefer to handle your “weight thing” on your own — if at all. I resist outside help because this issue is sensitive and the helpers often are not. I don’t know about you, but outside interference had the opposite effect on me than I suspect was intended. I managed to accumulate additional pounds with each unsolicited offer of help, God bless them every one.
When we were girls, my older sister Connie took it upon herself to help me with “my problem.” Her chosen method of helping included shouting, “You can’t eat that!” whenever I lifted a morsel of food to my lips. Sometimes my sis (who was a head shorter and half my weight) would appear from nowhere, screeching, hands extended like talons, to wrestle a spoon, fork or Ho-Ho from my hand. Connie was the reason I became a secret eater.
It’s hard to keep a secret when it jiggles at everyone you pass. I don’t know why, but when you are fat total strangers take it upon themselves to advise, council and chastise you (to your face and behind your back) about your size and your habits. Random shoppers at the grocery store give me something my friend Paige calls the “stink eye” after seeing food in my basket that they deem inappropriate for someone of my bodily bounty.
A woman I did not know once accosted me in the dairy section of a Whole Foods Market to tell me that I was headed to an early grave and that she knew of a diet that would save my life. I stood dumfounded as she whipped out a note pad and jotted down the principles of the eating plan for me, as well as a shopping list for that day. True story.
If you don’t know the overweight people you see — keep your comments to yourself. Unsolicited counsel may launch fat folks into the rich, creamy arms of Ben & Jerry.
Update: Since my emotional reorganization and commitment to follow my own heart and not someone else’s advice, I have lost 10 pounds without even trying.
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